Dumb and Dumber
The thing about being out of town/the country in modern times is that you might miss your TV shows if a hotel doesn’t have HBO or the Airbnb doesn’t have a TV, period. Especially, if you’re old like me and don’t like watch streaming video on mobile devices.
That said, due to social media I already knew how Game of Thrones ends--and didn’t care. I can’t think of another show I regularly watched in which I had so little emotional investment. (Ok, maybe Walking Dead.)
I spent July 1989 out of the country, which sounds fancier than it was, and when I returned, someone named Yahoo Serious had become famous. Between junior and senior year, I bleached my hair and colored it using Directions’ dye in “Tulip,” the Manic Panic precursor that wasn’t available in Portland at the time--I had to give money to friends who were driving to Seattle to buy a container. My sister saw me with my wet, reddish hair, sticking all out, and said, “You look like Yahoo Serious.” Who? What? Take that, person born in 1990 attempting to live like it’s 1994 for the Styles section. In reverse weirdness, the number one song in France in July 1989 was “Hotel California” and all the kids thought it was new.
I’ll have you know that Yahoo Serious is now 65 fucking years old.
While in Glasgow with no Amazon or Netflix (strangely, the hotel had an HBO channel that constantly aired Gentleman Jack but no Game of Thrones) I managed to know all about Fleabag’s “hot priest” and some refreshing menopause dialogue (that some--and when I use the sweeping “some” or “people,” I’m often just referring to strangers on social media--felt was TERFy. Ok, if I wanted to take offense--which everyone can anymore--it’s that the scene was millennial/boomer contrast, as always. #GenXErasure) despite not having the chance to even see season 2 of Fleabag yet. I’ve even experienced second-hand awe and jealousy over a 33-year-old woman not only being so accomplished but also being recognized for her obvious talents for a show I haven’t even watched yet.
Keeping with the entertainment theme, I never considered myself a horror fan, but the other night I found myself subscribing to Shudder after finding myself mindlessly scrolling through Netflix and Amazon looking for just the right scary show. You know it when you see it, but it’s not always easy to describe. I have a friend who used to say that I watch “guy shows” which was prompted by my liking The Sarah Connor Chronicles at the time. I do like sci-fi (fantasy is too much and I very much do not understand adult Harry Potter, Marvel/superhero genre fans) for similar reasons that I like horror, I guess to see something creepy and unexpected? I do not like gore/slasher films (though zombies are ok) but stories that seem normal, then turn strange or maybe supernatural or apocalyptic, often with an indie or international bent. That’s not an easy balance to strike. I only got into watching Game of Thrones because in the premiere they show White Walkers. My boyfriend at the time and I got into a disagreement about whether this was a supernatural show or not. He seemed to be right for quite some time. I can’t even remember how many episodes aired before there was even a tiny hint of any supernatural storyline. (Ironically, this boyfriend watched Supernatural regularly, which is totally a teenage girl show.)
Recent examples of good-to-me horror include It Follows, The Invitation, It Comes At Night (which led me to watch the director’s first film, Krisha, which is not horror or even close to Fleabag, but made me wonder how a 26-year-old guy could’ve made it), and A Dark Song. Sometimes these films are too indie in a good way like The Endless or Coherence or in a really bad way like Absentia, which I semi-watched last night.
Anyway, this digression was meant to be about whether it’s weird or not for your tastes to change as you age. Horror as a genre always seemed kind of immature to me, like it’s a natural fit for middle-schoolers and teens maybe because there is so much unknown and uncertainty in their lives. I read Stephen King as a 12-year-old but I wouldn’t as a 46-year-old. Also, are there differences between movies and books? I’m fine with horror-ish films but I wouldn’t read a horror novel unless it had some sort of literary cred or a personal recommendation behind it because I’m just like that.
I wanted to read a smart analysis about why teens and horror go hand-in-hand but only came up with a Quora question/answers, which always has struck me as a site for left-brained men who have no insights into human behavior (which one might describe as aspergery, but now that’s ablelist, sorry) which translates into saying that teens love horror because they are thrill-seekers, which is stupid/crazy/lame (yes, all slurs, which I get on one level, but who’s hurt by strangers using “stupid” or “dumb,” if accurate?). Ahem, now I’m well on my way to becoming an unfunny, out-of-touch lady Bill Maher or an old woman horrifying my (step) grandchildren by using the 2040 equivalent of “oriental” or “colored.”
Thank you for subscribing to my accidental middle-aged movie and TV newsletter.
I’m writing this on the longest day of the year, the start of my least favorite season. Of course, I’m very excited to go see Midsommar and start watching season 2 of Dark, which everyone should be watching instead of Stranger Things.
Stay stupid,
Krista