Midyear Check-in
Y2K skinny, Medicaid, Reading with your ears
I never intended this to be a work (or lack thereof) newsletter, so there’s that. Pivoting now…
I’m finally overweight!
That’s a phrase you don’t hear every day. Through GLP-1 magic, I’ve managed to cross the obese/overweight threshold, so now I’m merely overweight. Happy July!
Now that body positivity is dead, fewer brands are making plus-size options, and shaming and slurs are back in, can I be Gen X for a sec and talk about weight and sizes without a trigger warning? Numbers aren’t the problem. It’s like saying “bananas” instead of “crazy” when it means the same thing.
Yes, I get that mentioning specifics can make people feel like shit. Like when someone says they’re fat and it turns out they’re like 140 pounds, which maybe if you’re 4’11”? Or if someone says size 18 is huge but you wear size 18. It’s hard not to compare yourself to others. I think that’s what brains do? Conversely, I do feel better, mentally, when I see larger/gray-haired/older women in my social media feeds.
I consciously try to cultivate good vibes when I’m mindlessly scrolling. Though I’m absolutely fascinated by Beauty Brokers on IG. The before and afters are absolutely bananas! Nuts! Wild!
BTW, Millennials in no way suffered worse diet culture than any generation before them, but you wouldn’t think so if you’re actively online. As if the early ‘00s were peak “no fatties” because Jessica Simpson (in high-waisted jeans) and Bridget Jones (as a UK size 12, i.e. US 8) were considered plump.
Have you heard about the ‘80s? Or the ‘50s? I went to goddamn Weight Watchers when I was in third grade! I can’t even imagine a contemporary eight-year-old weighing food on a scale or going to meetings.
When I got diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes in my late 30s, my doctor (who told me I could always adopt a biracial baby when I said I said I didn't want to have kids) was very weight-loss focused.
I was going to say “my current doctor” but I can no longer see the doctor I had been going to for the past five years or so because I’m now on Medicaid and have to go to a low income clinic and can no longer get my prescriptions delivered via Amazon (I know! They’re shit anyway! I just hate having to drive to CVS within Target [ANOTHER shit company!] practically every other day to pick up a different medication.
That said, all my prescriptions, including estradiol patches, Vyvanse, and Mounjaro are free, which was wildly unexpected. And probably not for long since didn’t Medicaid just get gutted? My boyfriend is on Medicaid. Two of my good NYC friends are on Medicaid. Nearly no one I know has a steady job anymore. Oh shit, I said I wasn’t going to talk about work (or the lack thereof)! One quick thing: I did not anticipate everyone being so poor in middle age!
Anyway, I have not been pushed to lose weight by any medical professionals in recent history and the point I was winding up to make is that I was very surprised to discover that BMI standards have changed since 2010, not that its usage is any less dubious. I can now weigh 10 more pounds for my height and not be obese. Progress?
Ok, I am someone who didn’t really think listening to audiobooks counted as reading and now I can admit that I was wrong. I was having a horrible time trying to finish any ebook in the 21 days the public library lets you have one. And by the time you put another hold and finally get the book again, you can’t remember what it was even about.
But sometimes the audiobook version would be available sooner, so I tried The Perfect Scent by Chandler Burr on a plane and started getting hooked. I had completely forgotten that the New York Times had a perfume critic in 2009!
Audiobooks are better than TV for background noise if you’re doom-scrolling or doing Spelling Bee or I guess chores even though I barely do any.
In the past two months I’ve “read” the following works of fiction:
The second half of Miranda July’s All Fours. I preferred the first half!
Lydia Kiesling’s Mobility. More enjoyable than I’d expected for a “geopolitical exploration and domestic coming-of-age novel” that starts in the late ‘90s. OPI You Don't Know Jacques!, a gray-purple shade I still have, even got a mention.
Creation Lake by Rachel Kushner. I’m still on the fence about this one. I couldn’t finish The Mars Room, so maybe this just isn’t my author.
Beautyland by Marie-Helene Bertino. Maybe my favorite of the bunch, which ended up being an unexpectedly Gen X sci-fi story. Even though I almost bailed in one of the first chapters when it said the Heart sisters were from Chicago! WTF?!
I’ve started Katie Kitamura’s Audition but so far it hasn’t grabbed me.
Let me know what you’re reading or “reading” because I need to expand my horizons.
I really like your writing, Krista, thank you for sharing it. I just finished "reading" My Name is Barbra which is Ms Streisand's autobiography. It took me months to get through because I was listening on Spotify and kept getting capped on weekly audiobook hours (it's 59 chapters!) but I was not a fan before and I am now. She narrates it and goes off script. Before that I listened to Tom Lake by Ann Patchett which was very moving. I recommend both!
Congratulations on being overweight! I'd love to join you on that scale, but I'm still a bmi 35+ (eating my way through heartbreak takes a long time, ya know—I've put back on all the weight I had lost up until the quarantine). I'm on Medicare (unemployed, aka "retired") and haven't figured out how to get an OLP-1 for free. How have you done that? I tried a mail order prescription for Ozempic for not a small price, but when I didn't see any effect after 2 months, and thinking it might be a fake, I canceled. Good to get your newsletter in my inbox!